I’ve never had the kind of hair beauty magazines refer to as a “mane.” When I see hair in the drain and on my brush, all I ever think is “Damn! Could’ve used that on my head.” And while I’ve never been particularly self-conscious about it, it’s also not a point of pride. To me, it’s always looked like a bunch of wet leaves stuck to my head.

So after several bouts of bleaching and dyeing my hair, I was sort of delighted (while others looked on, horrified) that at least my hair, fried and raw as it was, had volume! Of course, the breakage and fall-out to follow soon urged me to consider moving from strictly “repair' shampoos, and onto “thickening' ones. And so we move full circle.

In my search to p-p-p-p-p-pump up the volume, I’ve found the Kevin Murphy Plumping line—a “densifying' wash (shampoo), rinse (conditioner), and spray called Body Mass. Let me tell you that my own follicular mass got critical real quick. I have not yet seen a product so truthful in its advertising. Plumping, indeed. After my first wash (and even letting my hair air dry), I got Southern Politician hair volume. You know how Dolly Parton quipped that the higher the hair, the closer to God? It was like I was halfway up Jacob’s ladder.

I did find it straightened out my hair texture. This would certainly be a boon to anyone wanting a smooth, gently closed follicle. If you’re looking for volume and smooth-straight Barbie hair, this is your ideal product. Personally, having grown up with pin-straight hair, I’m usually desperate to fluff up, fan out, and scrunch up my hair with as many wave-inducing products as possible to try to get a few bendy strands, so I felt a little thwarted by the smoothness. But I can also appreciate that the full benefits of this Plumping line might be unlocked by a few actual attempts on my end— I’m sure that a blow-dryer could have given me an even fuller crown and a curling wand may have added a little tousle back in my ends. But as Iggy Azalea axiomatically observes in Work, I’ve “got to get it how I live.” And I live pretty wash-and-go. And for those fellow on-the-go types, the Body Mass happily doubles as perfume, letting you walk around in a gingery-floral cloud for hours post-spray. Multitasking at its best.

The promise of the Plumping line is that it will eventually, with continued use, grow more unique hairs and thicken up your new growth. This seems to perfectly coincide with my own trajectory— I plan on cutting off my grown-out dyed hair in a few months, and, even though it’ll be short, at least I’ll have all my own hair back. Until then, I’m using the entire line exclusively, imagining that I am Lorraine to Kevin Murphy’s George McFly as he stammers to me about the prom—

'I am your density—

I mean,

Your destiny.”

—Trace Barnhill

Photographed by Tom Newton. Read more about hair here.