It’s obvious why a child would love Halloween, but what about an adult? Because unlike children, adults are tethered to practical nuisances, like money, time, and morning meetings on November 1. Am I really going to invest my cold, hard cash into becoming someone who is not me for one night? (If the person is Beyoncé, OK fine, take my money.) Also, must Halloween be celebrated on Halloween? When it falls on, oh I don’t know, a Thursday, what’s the proper etiquette for when to throw a party? The weekend before or the weekend after? And what does one do with the costume post-Halloween? Do people who are really into Halloween have a Halloween drawer? As a person who is simultaneously a homebody and cheap, these are questions that I don’t have answers to!

I want to get into Halloween. It’s one of the few occasions that’s a mandate for ridiculous fun and, not to mention, rife with makeup opportunities. It’s the costumes and the weeknight parties that throw me for a loop. If I have somehow pried myself from quality Real Housewives entertainment in order to stay in Manhattan after 9pm on a weeknight, at the very least I’d like the benefit of not having to explain who I am dressed as every five minutes, let alone buy said costume. And speaking of costumes, what would I be? Some people have a talent for choosing the most on-the-nose, pop culture-influenced getup. I do not. Which is just another way to say I don’t know how to approach Halloween at all. How do you? What would you say to a person who wants to get into this somehow someway, but doesn’t know where to start? I know there are some Halloween experts reading this. Now’s your time to brag about how you approach Halloween in the comments below. Please!

—Ashley Weatherford

Photo via Instagram.