En route to my Labor Day vacation (the pre-fashion-week equivalent of a 'babymoon'), I did an unthinkable, deplorable, special-place-in-Hell-for-people-like-me kind of thing: I took off my nail polish on the plane. You may be wondering, am I so self-involved that I didn't have an ounce of compassion for my fellow passengers? Is it not enough that they've been robbed of their leg room—must they also be denied breathable air? Hold your judgments! I was erasing my chipped manicure using RGB’s scentless soy-based, acetone-free Nail Color Remove Pads. Yes, scentless. Welcome to the future, ladies. We’ve arrived.
The travel-friendly, individually-wrapped towelettes are soaked with just enough formula to clean ten fully-coated fingers without alerting a single nostril to their function. However, in favor of not drying out your cuticles, they do leave your hands a little oily. Which means that unless you remembered to pack our highly-recommended Mustela wipes in your carry-on dopp kit (help us help you!), they will require you to wake your neighbors so you can get up and wash your hands.
While we wait for scentless nail polish to be invented (because, honestly, wouldn’t planes be the most ideal locale for a self-manicure? You have countless hours of forced sitting, you have an overhead spotlight…), there has been another advancement in the world of nail care: nail perfume! Strangebeautiful’s quick-drying, glossy, clear Richly Perverse is not your average preteen candy-scented vernis. Instead, SB is an eau de parfum that will mask the I-just-got-a-manicure-on-my-lunch-break odor with an edgier tobacco and leather floral that, after about ten minutes, peters out to smelling like you just have freshly-washed hands, rather than a perfume cloud on your digits.
Now I ask you: Has there ever been a better time to be a woman? Patriarchy is apparently dead, and you can do your nails (almost) anywhere. What's next, a lady president (actually...maybe)? Until then, I won't sweat my last-minute manicure, I'll avoid the urge to ask people to smell my nails, and in the event of an emergency, I always have an RGB pad.
Photographed by Mathea Millman.