Introducing: The Top Fridge

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I have never been so quickly dislodged from sanity as I was when I learned that Christopher Niquet stows his skincare in a fridge in his closet. I had a similar reaction when I first read about earlobe fillers or Emma Watson using pubic hair oil. (Are my lobes dinky? Is my nether region lackluster and brittle?) I would not be the laughing stock of the beauty community. I needed a Top Fridge.

The first matter at hand was: Was I comfortable storing unreasonably expensive skincare next to several bottles of A1 sauce? Hardly. Was I willing to abandon this idea? Also, hardly. Acting solely on impulse, I purchased a micro-fridge on Amazon. Smaller than a mini-fridge, it has a six soda can capacity and is unquestionably marketed to nursing mothers. When it arrived, I unboxed the contents (fridge, AC/DC USB power adaptors, instruction leaflet) and contemplated its design (sterile, pink, gently convex). Already too invested to turn back, I packed it full of products that benefit from being slightly colder than room temperature.

Why don’t you refrigerate your...

Unstable Serums

Vitamin C is very finicky. It’s light, oxygen, and temperature sensitive. It is to stability what Facebook is to peace of mind. The Sunday Riley CEO Rapid Flash Brightening Serum does great things to my gigantic pores and I get the added peace of mind knowing it won’t turn on me before I turn on it.

Day Moisturizer

Glow Recipe Watermelon Pink Juice Moisturizer has a watery gel texture: my preferred viscosity for the daytime. It relieves the skin tightness I get after washing off toothpaste splatters from the lower quadrant of my face without making me feel oily. Its scent (watermelon Jolly Ranchers) fades after a few minutes—much to the satisfaction of my migraines.

Selection of Hydrating Mists

This is where the fridge really shines. Herbivore Green Tea Balancing Toner is the only instance where something the color of Mountain Dew Baja Blast smells like a bouquet of jasmine. It contains salicylic acid via white willow bark for very gentle exfoliation. I use this at night. Caudalie Beauty Elixir has little blobs of oil suspended in it, like salad dressing, to balance my skin. I use that in the morning. When sprayed, both induce audible whimpers of bliss.

Probiotics

The brand, variety, and potency of this brand of probiotics are all arbitrary to me as I chose these blindly after a course of antibiotics left my digestive track in shambles. Because Whole Foods’ probiotic display is refrigerated, I maintain this notion at home. Peace has been restored to my microbiome.

Maybe: Fragrances

Should you store your perfumes in the fridge? This topic is controversial. The data is conflicting. Common sense tells you colder environments extends the longevity of perishable goods (Himalayan mummies, Captain America). However, too cold is also bad (The Day After Tomorrow, brain freeze). For clarity, I reached out to Jacqueline Steele, a perfumer and generally lovely person. She informed me that The Osmothèque in Versailles (“It’s like a fragrance museum,” for us plebeians) has a scent archive that stores really old and expensive perfumes at 50°F-ish. “It’s not as cold as a household fridge, more like a wine fridge.” Using that control as guidance, I put a thermometer in my fridge and left it overnight, checking every few hours. The temperature ranged from 53°F to 55°F, which is roughly 18°F colder than the ambient temperature of my bedroom. This fridge is far from archival quality, but it could come in handy over the summer or if you live in one of those climates that never snows. Above all, use good judgment and follow Jacqueline's rules: “no window sills, no cars, and no bathrooms with showers.” Light and humidity can be culprits, too.

Scalp Care

To know me is to know that my scalp hates me. I’ve mentioned before that T/Gel works, but at the expense of making me smell like tires for several days at a time. Sachajuan Scalp Treatment’s rosemary oil and menthol are exceptionally cooling when stored in my repurposed breast milk cooler. It’s lightweight like a lotion, doesn’t make my roots greasy, and within two applications, purged and calmed my scalp. I’ve since leaned my hair into several people’s faces while hugging them. No complaints. Yet!

—Or Gotham

Photographed by the author.